Is friendliness a science and how can it be commercially measured?

I must have asked this question a 1000 times to all levels of the industry – and I’ve yet to receive a clear answer.

The Hospitality Industry as we know it used to be called the Catering Trade until the early 90’s. As an industry we selected the word Hospitality as an upgrade and we are where we are today. But the question no one seems to know is what does the word hospitality mean given that it had a specific meaning before we nabbed it as a replacement for the Catering Trade.

The answer is that Hospitality is simply the relationship between a guest and a host, a concept that seriously predates the current hotel world we find ourselves in today. In fact the word hospitality originates from the ancient latin word hospes.

In todays modern hospitality industry, and certainly within the training we deliver, the definition of hospitality is how well one person (you) builds a rapport with the guest. It therefore follows that hospitality can be good, bad or indifferent. Now that we’ve agreed on what hospitality means to the modern GM or operator, we can begin to look at the base scientific evidence that qualifies what good, bad or indifferent hospitality looks like.

When I speak in terms of qualifying the various degrees of hospitality I’m actually qualifying what friendly looks like, and everyone I’ve ever met says that friendliness is subjective, as in, friendliness is measured differently depending on who you are. Whilst this may be partially true in the wider world, within hospitality it is definitely not. 

Let me explain. To be friendly is to exceed being polite with polite meaning a display of behaviour that is respectful and considerate of other people. Examples of being polite would be thanking a bus driver for your bus ticket, thanking someone for keeping a door open for you, or perhaps acknowledging another driver who pulled over to let you pass. I think we can all agree that these type of human interactions are not friendly but are as stated as people just being polite.

So what separates being polite (indifferent hospitality) with friendliness (good hospitality)? They key is communication with verbal communication rising above non-verbal communication. The importance of communication however isn’t just about 2 dimensionally asking if someone wishes to order a drink from the bar in a polite manner, but actually gathering information with the guest that has no relation to the service you’re delivering. Such examples vary in intensity but might be:

1. Hi, I’m John and I’ll be looking after you this evening. Have you had a chance to read though the drinks list?
2. Have you travelled far to be with us tonight?
3. Is this your first visit to our hotel?
4. Have you had a good day?
5. Have you been on holiday this year?
6. Where are you heading next?
7. Have you checked in, is everything ok with your room?
8. Would you like your usual?

These touch points are just broad intro statements that will provide an opportunity to expand the conversation AND the perception of your interest in the guest and ultimately the guests perception of friendliness from you.

In the hotels I’ve operated in we’ve used mood boards back of house to gather as much information about the guest as we could. ‘Show them that we know them’ was a key catchphrase that cemented the friendliness of the team towards the guest. Before walking the floor I would read the mood board and introduce myself with information the guest had already shared. Guests never ceased to find this impressive.

But why be friendly at all? What does it matter?

Being friendly to guests is an incredibly commercial endeavour and one which ultimately increases sales. When guests are relaxed and enjoy talking about themselves (sorry to be cynical) they’ll feel extra uber special, which in turn allows your product trained team to sell through the relationship. When all of the team have the opportunity to recycle the mood board information then things really begin to take off. 

So I think we can agree that being friendly and demonstrating good hospitality is evidenced not just within the mood board but also in sales, which is tracked through departmental trackers. The better your team get at smooshing the guest their confidence begins to really flow.

Imagine working in a restaurant with no guest focus for 8 hours during which you’re never anything more than polite. Where’s the fun in that. Work should be fun!

But I hear you say, ‘how can we spend time with the guests when we’re really busy?’. Indeed I’ve been asked that question so many times by my managers. The answer is that we need to be very much on our A game when we’re rammed because the volume yield delivered via large numbers is a real opportunity to not only drive revenue but also afford the extra staff on the floor to make this happen. As long as the team are yielding strongly through time spent with the guest then why not throw in more staff. If however, your managers and your team have no interest in delivering anything more than being polite you must accept the commercial write off.

Mirroring

As a veteran hotel inspector of a few thousand hotels I was often asked whether I felt the team that served me were friendly. Often I would robustly but politely respond ‘not’. The GM would then query why all of his guests think the team friendly and why I disagreed. The answer is simple. If you have really friendly guests it’s actually the guests that warm up the staff that in turn relax into enjoying serving the guest, and a cycle of friendliness is created. As an inspector I was always waiting for the staff to make the first move – I was often waiting indefinitely. 

This mirroring approach is often viewed as being accidental, inconsistent and never relies on training and product knowledge. It therefore follows that in those hotels where guests set the tone rather than the staff, training in guest care and product knowledge isn’t always prioritised so long as Trip Advisor ranks the hotel highly. Whilst this may have marketing benefits for the hotel, sales from the floor might never be fully maximised.

So in summary, Friendliness (good hospitality) + Guest Information (mood board content) = Increased Revenue (as long as your team are trained in weaving in the sales).

Whatever you do, acknowledge that you have friendly guests but don’t let them set the sales agenda. That’s your job.

Register to add your comments.